the beautiful sounds of my sons screaming at each other

“AHHHHHHHHH!” I hear from the basement.

In my mind I see the boys fighting all American Gladiator Style and I am sure one of them must be near death.

“Hang in there young sons,” I think. If I say it out loud then they might find me.

See, I am hiding in the office, which happens to be several feet from the basement. I am guessing unless there is bloodshed they will not summon the desire to locate me. I will just hear their shrieking sounds, “MOM! MOM! He’s [insert super dramatic moans here] I [pause] cannot [pause] breathe.” Then one of them will stumble back into the t.v. room and the other will push play only to be lulled by the sweet sweet sounds of “Phineas and Ferb.”

I hear a door slam. Was I hoping for too much? Will they continue. I am silent and they still do not know where I am. Thank God!

“OWWWW!” Kyle exclaims and then it is silent.

Again I hear Kyle, “Ahh ahhh.”

Now I am curious. He has expressed interest in the dramatic arts and I am thinking he is on to something. Give me a second. Invisible and like a fly on the wall, I will see just what is going on. Not a Deer Fly, however, those things with their crazy scissor teeth slit you open and put their fly juice in the wound. No, not a Deer Fly, just a quiet and pleasant fly on the wall.

I am back and this is what I heard:

“No!” Eli shouts.

“Then stop being mean!” Kyle responds.

“I am not being mean.”

With my boys now ages nine and eleven, I think it is high time they work it out on their own. I leave them be with them not even knowing I was there. Success.

By the way, Eli just informed me that he cannot look at, touch or think about Kyle or Kyle will shoot him with a bow and arrow, a Nerf bow and arrow, that is.