Happy 10th Anniversary Camper Van!

EXACTLY Ten years ago we hit the road. We had been living in the Washington DC area and had just sold our house. Dave had just sold his company, was on a semi-retired hiatus and perhaps feeling the success of his early internet dreams fulfilled, he had this crazy-crackers scheme to travel for a year or so in a Camper Van. I am not making this up.

See, earlier in the summer he proposed the idea to me. We were sitting in our office. The kids were asleep. I could tell he had something important to say because he turned his chair toward me, looked at me and said, “Beth, I have this idea.” Let me just preface this next part by saying that anytime Dave has an idea I am equally excited and traumatized. His ideas are big. His ideas have taken us far and once in a while his ideas seem a little too crazy for this world. I like what Dave’s close friends have said, “Beth, you and Dave are a great fit. When he gets one of his crazy, big ideas, you know how to reign him in.” They are right – and better – maybe I am the balance, or at least have the most excellent organizing and in this case, packing skills, to enable Dave’s brilliant and brave dreams. At least that is how I like to see it.

Yes, it is true. After I heard his hey-lets-take-our-wild-toddler-and-spazzy-baby-around-the-USA-and-Canada-for-a-year-or-so-in-a-camper-van idea, I absolutely thought he was nuts. “How are we going to travel with a baby and a toddler (we hit the road when Eli was eight months and Kyle was two and a half)?” I asked him. “That is a loooonnnnngggg time on the road!”

After a lot talking, I insisted that, before we buy the van, at the very least we take a substantial road trip before we made this gigantic life change. Although the boys had already logged in thousands of airline miles, up until then the boys had only flown long distances or taken short road trips. We packed, gathered books, snacks, dvds and our laptops. Back then in-car dvd players were new and the iPod Touch was a thing of future dreams. We strapped our boys into their Britax car seats in our truck, and hit the road, traveling to Minneapolis, my hometown. Lovely. The trip was lovely. Bringing Dave to my favorite memories is magic I always hold close. He saw the Brainerd, MN Paul Bunyan statue in the flesh. How awesome is that? On our way to Duluth we had to make a stop at dusk only to be attacked by a horror movie’s worth of Mosquitos. I laughed as Dave quickly rushed back into the car swatting mosquitos for another twenty miles. Sharing these experiences together, he saw Duluth for the first time and we both saw the rolling fog of Grand Marais for the very first time too. The kids were great. I mean, so much better than I could have hoped for. After making it all the way to Northern Minnesota from Washington DC, I actually believed we could pull off this traveling-as-a-family-in-a-camper-van dream.

Those early travel days were dotted with slides, walkways and sandboxes. We learned that stopping at any park along the way was an important part of the journey. If we could find a park, the boys could get out their wiggles. And honestly, I think through their eyes, through our necessity to stop and let our kids breathe, I have been able to see a whole and very cool new world. Even now we always look for a good place for the boys to explore and roam.

After spending time with my family and friends we made our way back home. I gave my OK and after Dave bid for it on eBay, we flew to Southern Florida where we purchased our 2002 Eurovan Camper. Excitedly we drove off the lot on that very hot summer day when the Air Conditioner stopped working just miles from the dealership! True Story! We spent another week at the beach while it was fixed (Summer in South Floria with no AC is no fun) and then made our way back to DC. Favorite stops: St. Augustine, FL. Who would expect this super old Colonial town just down the road from the Spring-Break-Capital of the world? Other favorite stop: Savannah, GA. I hope the gold-tooth-grill-kiosk is still at the mall on the town’s outskirts.

Back in DC, our house sold, we packed our things and said our goodbyes. The goodbyes I said back then are still some of the hardest. Kyle and Eli were leaving their good pals Quinn, Max, Emma, Maddie & Winston, and Dave and I were saying goodbye to our dear friends. Bittersweet were those moments. I remember my friend Stephanie as we said our last goodbyes saying, “You know I can’t say it. It is hard to see you go.” I felt it. In her words I felt our worlds change. She and I had spent nearly everyday watching our husbands dream and watching our boys grow. With tears in my eyes and the frog in my throat huge, I choked back my sobs. I did not want to go, yet I was excited to fulfill our dream.

We left our little piece of Heaven in Northern Virginia, made our way only as far as West Virginia, spending our very first fancy-camper-van-night at cold and rainy gas station on the side of the road. I had to hold Eli until fell asleep as my excitement quickly faded into fear. Mornings and the laughter of toddler Kyle in his pajamas on the side of the road erased my panic. It was a new day. I took a deep breath and we drove west, establishing rules of the road and labeling an old Nalgene bottle “Pee Cup.” Man it is nice to have boys. We stopped in St. Louis to see my brother Bill. Leaving Bill and his boys we drove through my favorite college town, Columbia, Missouri and unto Colorado, where we drove through Rocky Mountain National Park on the highest paved through road in the Continental US. We were on our way and were once again following our dreams.

We chose Utah as a home base, never ever planning to stay here long. My mom was here. She could watch our things while we were away and our friend Kim graciously let us crash at her condo while we were in town. We wanted to explore the west and Utah made sense at the time. We usually took three week trips and made our way through Canada and all over the Western US. I loved it. I hated it and once back in Utah, I could not wait to hit the road. Moraine Lake in Banff National Park is still one of my favorites. Watching Kyle canoe on the beautiful mountain water was divine. And then getting to stand on the dock during a helicopter mountain rescue was pure delight. I wish the boys remembered as much as we do. We have pictures. They hear stories and this was our time to be parents of these beautiful little boys.

I fell in love with Vancouver, BC and tried to figure out how we could move there. Border Patrol was so much more intense near Seattle then it was in Montana. We had to get out of the car because I had apples, and see my Fuji Apples from the Vancouver Farmer’s Market were not allowed to enter the country. Eventually we made it through onto Seattle, then Portland. Our camper van took us to San Francisco, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, Big Sur, Moab, Montana, New Mexico, Idaho, Nevada and Arizona. I am sure I am missing a state or two in there.

My very favorite part really was the kids. They thought living in a camper van was the best thing ever. Kyle was over the moon to be able to sleep in the pop-up part with Dave each night. Eli was too small and wiggly. I loved those seconds as his little body released in my arms as he drifted off to sleep. I miss those moments of snuggling him close. Towards the end our camper van journeys Dave and I were able to sleep on the same level. I liked that best.

I think it was those camper van days that have made the boys open and fearless. They know how to travel. They entertain themselves best while on the road. In the van when they had watched one too many “Land Before Time” movies, I would hand them a book of stickers or some dollar store Band-Aids. They spent hours covering themselves with every last one. It was hilarious and it is these moments that have forever changed and bettered my world. I am grateful. Happy Tenth Anniversary, Camper Van! We miss you!


PS: The links I have added to this post link back to original camper-van-travel posts. I am surprised at how different my memories of those times are. I love the Eli-barfing story on the Moab link. It is sad and hilarious! Enjoy!

Tagged : / / /

Why Traveling Makes You a Better World Citizen; even walking up our big hill

The boys on our hill

On the nights I decide we have not been sufficiently active I demand the boys (yes Dave too) walk the 1.2 mile, giant, steep, and heart-thumping hill close by. The hike is fast. The climb is hard and in a very short amount of time you can get in a good workout. The boys go to bed at 9:00 PM on school nights and wanting to make their bedtime, at 8:25PM I declared, “We must walk and we must walk now!” Moments earlier Dave asked if we were going on a walk. I was trying to finish up some research so I put him off. I feel badly because he and Eli were ready to go.

Yet with the clock ticking I insisted we were still going. As this pronouncement left my lips, Eli completely blew a gasket. Tears streamed down his face as he urged, “Mom, I worked very hard to get all my homework done so I would have enough time to watch t.v. and I WAS READY! If we go on a walk now then I won’t be able to! Mom, I never have time to watch [insert loud scream here]!”

Believe me I wanted to give in. Eli did work hard and he had a lot of homework. He was ready minutes before and I was not. I did not even know if we could be back by 9:00PM. I took a deep, am-I-doing-the-right-thing-by-forcing-my-boys-to-go-on-a-walk breath and said, “Eli, get your jammies on. Let’s get out the door and if we walk really fast I think you will be able to watch television for ten minutes.”

“No! Mom! No! It will take too long!” Eli insisted as I placed his pajamas (track shorts and an old t-shirt) in his hands. And of course as I readied Eli I thought of my own childhood and the time my own parents had the wacky idea of waking us up at 6:00AM everyday to “jog” (walk) the local high school track. Many-a-day did I shake my fists at Jim Fixx and his damn running book. And now Eli was shaking his fists at me and I really could not blame him. Not a Tiger Mom am I, but I sure want my boys to learn the joy of an active lifestyle. I am grateful my mom always urged us to walk around Lake Harriet every Sunday. I am glad she, and for that matter, my grandma (her mother), taught me to move.

Lake Harriet Summer 2010

“Guys! Guys! Kyle! Dave! Let’s go! We need to be back before 9:00PM!” I yelled.

Dave and Kyle met us at the front. It was a dark, moonless night, so dark that stars had no problem shining through. “Mom, look. It’s the Big Dipper!” Eli exclaimed. His tears were gone and we raced ahead of Dave and Kyle.

“Mom, my leg hurts. Slow down. I can’t walk fast.” Kyle pleaded. “Dave, Kyle, will you walk together? I made Eli a promise and I want to keep it.” Dave graciously turned back and I heard them talking about stars, literature, science and all the things they love to talk about. Their voices faded as Eli and I hustled up the hill. Not another sad word was uttered. I do not even think Eli cared if we made it home by 9:00PM.

We heard crazy dark-night-noises and laughed about my very sensitive startle response. As Eli grabbed my hand he giggled and said, “Mom, remember the other night when we were walking up the hill? You screamed when you thought the man wearing a backpack was a moose?”

“Eli. I startle. I startle easily and I am glad you have better eyes than I do. You can see all the scary things coming for us.” We both laughed and Eli piped in, “Like that garbage can right there. You night think it is a bobcat.”

“I couldn’t do it without you, Eli.”

We reached the top and Eli noticed a man in the darkness standing behind his car smoking. It was weird for us to see him there, especially after talking about all the nighttime surprises. Eli grabbed my hand again, we turned and headed down, passing Dave and Kyle. Dave tried to walk with us and Eli and I both insisted he walk to the top too.

Easy E off-roading in Mexico

And somewhere between the huffs and puffs and creepy-night-noises, I asked Eli, “how does travel make you a better world citizen?” (thank you Wendy Smith). My friend had asked me the same question earlier, her question and travel were on my mind.

“Mom, travel makes me less afraid. It makes me feel like I can go anywhere and do anything. I like to see how the rest of the world gets along.” Great answer! Travel does make us brave. Eli and I agreed it also makes us open. What I didn’t realize in that moment is that you do not have to travel far. Just moving and pushing yourself does just that; you are pushed and pushed out of your comfort zone. Eli began our walk completely irritated and he had every right to be completely irritated. We persisted. No was not an option and we both rose above. Because we opened the door, left our house and moved we had one of my favorite mom/som experiences ever. I am proud of Eli for pulling through. And yes, we walked fast enough! We came home, he had his ten minutes and then he happily went to bed.

Tagged : /

One wrong word & my switch flips. Thank God for Old School Rollerblades!

Rollerblading at the Farm Park

We were finishing our fourth lap around the Farm Park and Dave said one thing. I lost my mind and then wanted to punch him in the mouth. I am a lot like Eli or is he a lot like me? Instead of punching Big Daddy in the mouth I said, “I am driving home. You take the kids in your car. I will make dinner. Goodbye.” I kept my word, got in my car and drove away.
Continue reading “One wrong word & my switch flips. Thank God for Old School Rollerblades!”

Tagged : /

Sex, Drugs & Bullies: Middle School is Keeping Me on my Toes

The Boys Shoveling the Driveway

 

Kyle and Eli were each doing their homework. I was sitting next to them. Somehow our conversation led us here:

Me: “What do you guys think of bullies and bullying?”

Kyle: “Don’t do it. It is mean. And you know you have a good friend if they will stick up for you.”

Me: “What are bullies like?”

Kyle:  “Bullies are liked the little deformed guppy (I have no idea what he means by this). They are always mean to you just because they are.”

Eli: “If you win something that you can share, then all of a sudden the bully will be really nice to  you because they want what you have.”

Eli continued to tell me that bullies are people who are not your friends and that they are only nice to you if you are good at sports. Really and more specifically, they are only nice to you when you are playing the sports you are good at, you can make them look even better by helping them win.

“Son. You have figured out humanity. Really. You have.” I responded and then thought to myself because what I was thinking was way too cynical to fill the head of a ten year old boy, “Make people feel good about themselves. Of course the kid only likes you at sports. Thank God you are good at sports or your life would really suck.  You help him look better because it is all about him winning. Yes and tell him how awesome he is. Then he will always pick you on his team and because he always picks you, the other kids will eventually see that you are cool too. Oh and ignore others who are being hurt by him.  You do want to get into that mess. It will only draw unneeded attention to yourself.  Be a Sycophant! Most importantly, only tell the bully what he wants to hear.”

Continue reading “Sex, Drugs & Bullies: Middle School is Keeping Me on my Toes”

Tagged : / /

Adams Family Dilemma #437

Easy E

Kyle has been downstairs for a few minutes while Dave is downstairs on a scary business call. I go downstairs and find the basement incredibly quiet. I look and look and finally see a little light coming from the basement bathroom. I find Kyle. He is pooping. (um, I know some of you out there don’t care much for poop stories, but I promise this one is clean — wink).

Hey buddy, I was wondering what you were doing?

Mom, I am pooping. Will you stay down here and keep me company?

(As the words left Kyle’s sweet lips, I was thinking to myself about the fact that I really needed to run upstairs to the other bathroom so I could do what he was doing.)

Kyle, I really need to go and check on Eli. Here is some toilet paper. It’s just the right amount.

(You see, Kyle gets nervous about plugging the toilet due to the one time he did after using up a roll of toilet paper in one sitting. Argh! Where were his parents?)

Mom, there are ten squares. Is ten squares the right amount?

Yep, you will be good.

Great! Thanks Mom.

The millisecond I know Kyle is all right, I sprint upstairs towards the other bathroom where I am met by Eli.

Mom.

Yes Eli?

I really need to poop.

And this is what I, as the mother, do when both boys need to poop: I wait.

Tagged :

Happy Seventh Anniversary, Dave!

Copper Tea Kettle
Copper Tea Kettle

Last week this copper tea kettle came in the mail for me. Dave and I had seen one just like it on our recent trip to Washington DC. Dave had secretly ordered it for me. Because I can be a little wishy-washy about things, once it came, I wasn’t sure if I wanted this tea kettle or the one with the automatic hand mechanism. That was until I made a certain discovery. Unbeknownst to either one of us, the seventh anniversary just happens to be the copper/wool anniversary. With this knowledge, at once my wishy-washy copper tea kettle became this beautiful (albeit slightly sappy) copper symbol of our love, a fortuitous little kettle that was meant to be in our home. Funny how simple information can change an opinion, isn’t it?

. . . When Dave and I were dating and our communication was colorful and open, I know many people thought our open communication would break us. Some people could not even fathom that we were a romantic couple because we were such incredible friends. Au contraire! It is that same open communication and fantastic friendship that has made this marriage work, and work so well.

You are my best friend, my husband, my rock-star lover and the father of our children. There are moments, like last night when you accused me of putting the chicken in the freezer, when I want to bite your head off and eat it. Those moments are brief compared to all the wonderful, amazing time we have spent together. I mean it. Last week as we drove past the Bethesda Residence Inn, where we spent the first night of our marriage, I felt glad and amazed at how fast it has gone. As we drove by our Poolesville, Maryland  reception site (now a Chinese Buffet  — and of course), I thought of posing (again) for those unconventional wedding photos we took on on the Poolesville lawn. I thought of our very yummy cake that was way too small. I cringed thinking about my dress that was way too tight. I laughed out loud when I thought of a particular ex-girlfriend of yours, the one who hit you in the head, hard, with the bottle she was supposed to be using to blow bubbles with. Our wedding was absolutely perfect!

Dave and Beth Rockville, Maryland 2005
Dave and Beth Rockville, Maryland 2005

As I read my archives (which in many ways articulates my feelings much better), I was reminded that last year our anniversary slipped your mind and I was a little upset. Consequently, you felt and appreciated my sorrow then and now. This year not only has the calendar on you computer been flashing reminders for the past week, but so has your PDA. I have seen the places you have written our special date down and yesterday you asked me what I wanted to do for our anniversary. Thank you for not forgetting. I know you are remembering because you know how much it means to me. And this is precisely why I think our marriage works so well. Thank you for loving me and letting me love you.

Happy Anniversary Dave! I love you!

 

Tagged : / /